Rips in the Wings

Short post today.

I feel simultaneously secure, comfortable...and jittery, unsure. Not a good feeling. Don't even ask; it's one of those strange Emily schizophrenic moments that makes me want to hurt myself. I have been getting a little less confident about things lately. Everything from my walk with God to my likeability to my friendships to my looks to my family to--well I just have been having a lot of stupid doubts.

I'm reading the Randy Alcorn book Heaven. It was assigned to me by my mom, but I think I'm really going to enjoy it. He obviously can't possibly know all about heaven, but at least I know he truly searched the Word and has come to his conclusions with prayer and faithfulness.

Sometimes I guess we get caught up in living for God here (which is what we're supposed to do!) that we forget: every believer gets to spend all of ETERNITY worshiping God, loving Him, and communing with him--with all other believers from all time! What a gift the Lord has in store for us!

I did a computer test thingy--I entered my photo into a program to see what "celebrity" I look like. I did it with a few other girlfriends too. Michelle, Megan, and Danna. They ALL came out as looking like gorgeous, glamorous movie star ladies. I came out as Bill Gates. Typical. :'(

So I just got my ear pierced on the left side yesterday. Bishelly came with and we had fun. It looks pretty good too. Next one is possibly going to be a little hoop in the side of the ear. But I don't know yet. Maybe a little nose stud? When I get older, I'm almost definitely getting a tattoo on my ankle. None of these things have been okay'd by my parents...yet. They may change their minds yet. ;)

Mom and Lily did the first campout shopping today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (that's 23 exclamation points) That's exciting!!!

I think I'll end every post with a verse reference. But I'll just do the reference (it'll make you guys look it up yourselves haha) So go read...James 1:2-7. idk I just really love everything in James.

Blogging? More like slogging...

I'd like to start off by saying that I myself did not delete that paragraph or those comments. That was my mother. My parents have made the decision that I will not be seeing The Dark Knight. My feelings on the subject shall remain undisclosed.

I haven't been posting for several reasons. One, my family did some stuff for the first couple days of the week. Dad had Monday and Tuesday off, so we spent the time together. My favorite place was the lavender farm we went to. Have any of you guys ever been to a lavender farm? It's purple and peaceful and smells AMAZING! I found myself singing hymns and dancing in the sprinklers like an idiot. And the nice lady who owned the place runs a little business; she gives you a zip-tie and lets you fit as much lavender as you can in it for $5.
Daddy also bought some lavender-mint tea, which I am drinking right now (quite good).

On Wednesday I saw the Parks again for the first time in two weeks (two weeks is longer than it seems)! Megan and I spent the night at their house and we three (me, Megs, and Bichelly) slept on the tramp. I always love that. Megan had to leave at 9:00 the next morning, which was stinky for all. Meaning, Michelle and I didn't get to hang with her as long as we'd have liked, and she had to go to work on five and a half hours of sleep! XP

Today started out good and ended badly. Even though it's not over yet. This morning, Mom, Lily, and I went shopping and I scored a major find at Kohl's Early Bird Sale. So far, so good. Then we did some other running around town. The weather was nice, and the stores we went to weren't boring. Still not a bad day. We came home, and I sat down to read a novel. The rest of the family was watching a movie, so I had some nice alone-time in the living room. Then when the movie finished, they all came into the living room. I was surprised and rather ashamed at how irritated I was that they were chattering and banging around so fast after their movie finished. I mean, they weren't acting any different than usual...I just was being more of a recluse than normal. So here it starts to get grumpified.
I decided to do some proofreading for Muriel on her story, "The Blood on the Sidewalk," when I remembered that I had lost it. Bad feeling in pit of stomach. Guilt, embarrassment, annoyance at myself for being so careless. I'm probably going to have to reprint out the first draft and have her mark out the corrections AGAIN. That was a major goof on my part.
Next, I decide to look for my missing makeup bag. Note: my makeup is not irreplaceable, nor is it completely necessary.
But it's expensive. And tomorrow is Sunday.
So I start digging around in my stuff, to no avail. It's not there. Either it is buried in some hidden corner of my room (doubtful) or it's at the church. In which case, someone may have moved it or taken it thinking it was theirs.
So now I'm getting upset. I've lost two things that I consider important! Frustrated, I decide to start on my new novel from the library. Now, this isn't a book I checked out; it's a book that I got from completing the summer reading program. It's MINE. So I ask Mom, "Hey, where is that book I gave you to put in your briefcase at the library?" You can guess the response.
"You never gave me a book at the library."
So I scramble around my room, the bookshelves in the family room, even the car. It's not there. I dig through Mom's entire briefcase, hoping she's wrong about this. Of course she's not.
You guys don't understand how I feel about books, so this next sentence is going to seem very ridiculous.
I shut myself in my room and cried. Big, hot tears all over the knees of my pants. Dead serious.

Tomorrow's softball picnic should be sort of fun.

Aaaahhhh...Peace and Quiet

After two weeks of rubbing a cheese grater on my nerves, my cousin has gone back home. I did enjoy having him here, but two weeks is a long time. He kept saying stupid stuff like, "I am chocolate!" or "Good job," and patting me on the arm. I probably embarrassed him because I started shrugging him off and twitching away when he would pat my shoulder or whatever. It was just a little too much!

[Paragraph deleted]

Mommy's painting the family room. Shhhhhh it's a surprise for my dad! It actually looks really great; nice tan color with a little brown glow. And we're getting a bunch of bookshelves for our library. That I am REALLY excited about. Imagine: a whole wall, crammed with all kinds of books imaginable! You probably can't guess how important that is to me.
I have five books to read by the end of summer. That's not including the six I already read. I hope I get it all done! Maybe I'll finish really early and be able to cram in another one. Books are from heaven.

Lazing.

Is lazing a word? As in, "I'm just lazing around," or "There's got to be more to do than lazing!" Yes, it is a word.
And that's all I'm really doing right now. I did my morning chores...*huge yawn* and listened to some music...fun but I ALWAYS do that. I'm beginning to think that my brain is powered by listening to songs, because I get this weird jitterish feeling when my house is silent. And then when I turn on some songs, my whole mind just feels better.
I saw WALL•E on Saturday! It was sooooooo sweet and very incredibly animated. The characters said practically nothing for most of the movie, but that's ok. The story was just as good without dialog, seriously. And the little Pixar short before the movie...absolutely priceless! I don't think my dad and I have laughed that hard at slapstick for a long long time. Aaron and Lily weren't QUITE as thrilled about the movie as I was, but I think they like it.
Sunday's GBI was like a graveyard. With all the people on vacation, there were a total of like, 15 attenders! That included the babysitters with the kids. I got this warm fuzzy feeling during my kid-watching time. When I walked in the nursery, Caleb Smith asked, "Are you the next nursery shift?" I said yes, and all the kids cheered and jumped around! Made me feel really happy.☺☺☺
Today is Rebekah's birthday party. I still haven't gotten her a prezzie, so we'll pick one up on the way over there. I love that kid! She's so sweet and gentle. And she said I'm still her best friend. Another happy moment...kids rock!
Yesterday Aaron and I made cherry-rose petal preserves. It was pretty time-consuming, and it basically tastes like cherry jelly. With a hint of rose fragrance. But oh-well, it gave us an excuse to dress up in face masks and be the...COOKING NINJAS!!! We were going to videotape it and put it on YouTube, but it didn't turn out to very interesting videos. So scratch that.
Right now Lily's reading the Bible, Mom's at coffee with friends, Aaron's playing RuneScape, and I'm finishing this blog. A pretty average Tuesday.
Later, fiends--er, friends!

No title coming to mind

So Michelle spent the night after the party on the 4th. *sniff* They're going to Colorado for a couple weeks, so it'll be the last one for a while. I don't like it when friends leave, even for such a short time. Makes me depressed.

Anyway. After church, I went with Megan and her family to a park type thing. We were going to swim the creek, but it was c-c-cold! So we sat around the fire and ate Polish sausage. Quite a good backup plan. Her grandparents told us that marshmallows have pig fat in them! That is so weird and pretty GROSS.
I'm listening to a playlist I made called "Delightfully Cheesy Songs." It's so marvelous! It has stuff like Barry Manilow, N*SYNC, Styx, even Carman! hehe very very cheesy stuff. Right now it's playing Strange Magic by Electric Light Orchestra.

Ok, talk to you great people later.

Happy 4th of July!

So I've finished (I hope) helping prep the house for our party today. I am rather sad and depressed, though. I always love Independence Day parties at my house...but look outside! It's overcast, windy, and might even rain! That really makes me grumpy-faced.
I've seen Much Ado About Nothing twice in the last week, loving it both times! For those here not into Shakespeare (or those who have never tried it), I am sad for you. The tricks, the romance, the tragedy, the hilarity of MAAN is superb! Emma Thompson amazes me in everything I see her perform.
One final note on the interesting conversation my last post sparked: if I talk ceaselessly about movies and clothes, I am sorry. I will work on that.
I have a new project that is pure genius! Anybody who was at Wednesday night Bible study this week will probably know about my sticky-note project. I am having each one of my friends take a single yellow Post-It note and write or draw something on it. Each one of those is going on my ceiling! So far I have 13. So if you're reading this blog, that must mean you're my friend, right? So make me a Post-it note! No seriously.
Guess what I watched yesterday? Space Jam!