A Good Day.

Today Jeff came over...twice! :) The second time he came over he drove his motorcycle, which was kinda cool. I have kind of gotten used to the idea of a motorcycle being a feasible means of transporation, but when he drove away I still felt a little scared and uttered a short prayer. So, yes, it still seems dangerous to me. But it is ooookay. I will not worry about it...-_-

But anyway, when he was here, we destroyed some stuff in the backyard. First we pulled apart that old, broken couch swing. That was pretty easy, so we worked on the playhouse. Yes, the playhouse is completely obliterated. I won't lie; I'm a little sad about that. I have some fun memories with that thing, and I know that the little kids will miss it when they come over in the summer. But it's okay, at least it gave Jeff something to ax down! hehe he was laughing when he saw how fearful I was of that ax. Come to think about it, he was laughing at me the whole evening! Oh well, I suppose I make an entertainingly dumb sight oftentimes.

Today in my writing class, I was assigned to write something that is my favorite memory. I had two choices in my head that I bounced back and forth between. I finally chose Bible quizzing, which has had a profound and very positive impact on my life, mostly in the way of relationships. If there was one time I could ever go back and relive, that would be it. With almost nothing done differently. Isn't it rare how often that happens! Even the best memories will sometimes have something that you wish you could go back and fix. It's a treasure when something is a blessing from God from beginning to end, no doubt about it.

The other thing that was runner-up was actually an evening I had this last campout. Jeff, Bek, me, and Jason all went out and talked on the docks. I got to lie down and watch the stars during that time, and it was really good conversation. I'd hung out with Jeff before, but never really gotten to know anything all that deep. It felt good to be able to have a conversation with someone that is completely serious, but still really enjoyable. And of course I loved talking to Bek. I don't get to see her all that often, only once a year usually. She's more mature than a lot of people give her credit for, I think.

I'm supposed to be in bed right now. I'm not tired. But I will go to sleep now, because I know that I'll be zonked in the morning if I don't. :(

Lily likes Sour Sixteen

Today was Valentine's Day. But more importantly, it was Lily's birthday party! We went to the ice rink, which was surprisingly un-packed. I am not by any means good at ice skating, but I still had fun. And I didn't fall down, so that's something! Afterwards we went to Megan's house for some ice cream and Bill's presents. The Loynes family and I all pitched in and got Lily a very nice airsoft gun, which she definitely liked. Perfect timing too: Loyneses are having an airsoft war pretty soon. Even if I have to borrow one, I am going to be there. Airsoft is amazingly fun, even for someone with no shooting skills like me. So now Lily is 16, and I'm 18. Is anyone else seriously freaked out by that fact?

This makes my fourth post in a row that is ridiculously short. I'll get back into normal posting soon.

"It's my-ee aighteenth birthday-ee tuhday-ee!"

Although I hate that character (and was sort of glad when she died...I'm a spiteful creature!), I've been saying that line all day and will continue to chant it till tomorrow! :D

Which means that today is my eighteenth birthday! Daddy took me out to breakfast eeearrly (I got up at 5:15 and we got to the restaurant at 6:00), where we had a very nice talk. He gave me a gift card to Barnes & Noble, which OF COURSE I was very excited about! It was Cindy's day off, though, so I didn't get free fruit or anything. :( When I got home, Mom gave me some num-nums and tasty juice! Grandma gave me a sweater that is pretty much the softest thing ever. I love my family so very very much (this is not because they give me stuff on my birthday).

I complained, both to others and myself, yesterday about how I really thin that eighteen is too old for me. Not that I am not ready to face up to life (okay, well maybe I'm not, but I'm getting there), but I really ought to be considered as an adult now. Yet, I know I will not be unless I act and think like one. Do I want to? I believe that I do. It's just a slightly difficult transition for me.

I have library work today, and Megan's picking me up afterwards. We, along with Mishmash and Danna, are going to have a really weird slumber party that I am quite positive will result in extreme sleepiness the next day at Courtney's concert. 240 milligrams of caffeine is something that I am quite interested to learn the effects of.

Speaking of concerts, did I tell you guys yet about that concert coming up? On March 22, Jeremy Camp, MercyMe, Hawk Nelson, and Tenth Avenue North are coming here. Best part is, there's no advance purchases of tickets. Just show up at the door and give them $10! I really want to go, and I think that if we get together a big enough group, it could happen...yes it's on a Wednesday, but I never ever miss Wednesday nights. I think that I can be absent just once.

Danna told me on Wednesday that I am very open on my blog. Funny, I always thought that I was rather reserved to what I'm really feeling...I think that certain blogs, which write mostly in secretive allegories, can be more enlightening into the inner thoughts than mine. This is because if you know what you're looking for, it's not that hard to decipher what someone really means by supposed random type.

I met Coralynn yesterday! I have to admit, all the crazy cooing that Michelle and Marinda have been doing over that kid is not over-the-top at all. She's so adorable! Her eyes are enormous, and she's super chubby. Chubby babies are fun to poke. I was quite entertained yesterday by staring her down intensely; I think I either intrigued or disturbed her. Or even better, both! >:)

Which is worse: to be absolutely sure of something, but change your mind several times, or to admit that you really don't know for sure what you think yet--and keep people in the dark as to what you really feel?

My hair is getting really long. Meh, I'm too lazy to go get it cut hehe.

The past few days have not been stellar. Well, there have been bright spots, but overall I feel like there hasn't been too much yay going on.

I spent my Saturday lounging about and doing a small amount of shopping until 5:30, when we had dinner with the Parks. That was nice, until Jordan and Michelle got into drilling me with questions and giving "advice." The advice they gave soon turned into code talk between them about something or other that has to do with me, but I can't know about it. Ugh. I spent the next 24 hours trying to understand what they were hinting about, to no avail. I'm not even going to think about it anymore.

Megan ditched the first couple hours of Potts Night for a Superbowl party, but I can't hold that against her. We held our own quite well without her there, as a matter of fact; Jeff's debate topic really got me thinking. It's rather shocking to myself when I realize that something I thought I had analyzed thoroughly turns out to be (most likely) a preconceived idea that really doesn't have a lot of solid, Biblical basis. I'm not sure if the discussion is put off for a further time or if I need to wave the white flag right now...we shall see.

Today was a jumble of Emily being a brat, Mom being a whiner, and Lily being incomprehensible. That makes a very nasty tasting stew! Oh well, we're not arguing now, so that's something.

This Friday, Megsie is hopefully going to spend the night here, but the next day is still hazy. I was planning on having a bowling party, then going to my house for pizza and stuff...but I really don't know. Courtney has a concert that day, and I really want to be there to vote for her and stuff. That is at one o'clock, and I don't know how long it goes to. There's a bowling alley really close to that, but I checked the prices (it would be cosmic bowling at that time), and it costs quite a lot. Ridiculous really. -_-

When I get a thought in my head, saying "Why can't they just leave me alone?" Is that wrong?

My Goals for the next Decade.

Okay, here they are:

1 year:
have my driver's permit.
be an expert on something.
be nice to Lily.
get in shape.
be a good cook.

5 years:
work with books.
have a driver's license.
go on a road trip.
be a bridesmaid.

10 years:
married with kids.
maybe doing some writing.
have something published.
have an active ministry in my church.

Back in the drill...

So life's boringness has set back in. School started yesterday, which means I have a *shudders* bedtime every night except Fridays. So far my classes are going okay though. We'll see how things go in a couple weeks, when all the novelty of 12th grade work is gooooooone.
Bapa called today; I love my Bapa! He is so proud of me, it makes me feel guilty. I wish I was as good, smart, and unique a kid as he thinks I am. But it made me feel so good talking to him. Especially because I'm not really that close to much of my family (outside my church family).
So I'm supposed to start a "senior project" soon. I need ideas. What's something I can do that will teach me something, benefit other people, and still be a realistic goal? idk what my time limit is, but hopefully I'll have at least a semester.
Have you guys ever heard of Mindfreak? Criss Angel is AMAZING!!!! He's like the best magician ever. I sometimes don't even want to watch his tricks, because I'm sure he's seriously going to DIE. Today I watched him (on Youtube) get run over by a steamroller. I don't understand how he does this stuff, but that's part of the fun.
So Danna's party is on Saturday! Yay, my girl is 16. Can't even believe it. I had to laugh at Jeff's face on Wednesday when he heard she's only sixteen. Danna gets a lot of that. I remember when we first were "friends." I put that in quotes because we HATED each other, but would still play together all the time. We were both really headstrong children. And look at what an amazing, beautiful, mature young woman Jordanna has grown up to be. I hope I've grown up a little...hey, God's still working on me! Like Ryan said at his baptism, "I'm not a finished project."
I discovered a poet the other day, when I was just browsing around. Her name's Charlotte Mansfield. Her work is pretty diverse, but idk if it's good or not. I'm not the best judge of poetry. Here's her most recent one:

--Wasted--
An entire life of emptiness
Is no real life at all.

Feeling strong and thinking
That I'm walking oh, so tall.

When really I'm in shambles
And cannot even crawl.

Life does not begin
Until we see ourselves as small.


idk, I just thought it seemed sort of poignant or something....

Campout 2008

Learning about the glories of heaven.
Drawing close to God.
Drawing close to God's people, my real family.
Lying on the docks, having good conversations.
Eating marshalades and throwing them.
Seeing the Predmores.
Singing to the Lord in the kitchen.
Calling Melinda all kinds of weird names.
Hiking up an easy hike...that practically killed me.
Boating across the lake with amazingly cool people.
Eating my mom's world-famous food.
Helping my mom cook that world-famous food.
Playing "Down by the Banks" and not feeling stupid about it.
Being silly.
Being serious.
Looking at my future with fear and happiness.
Seeing Vengeance Creek.
Trying ping pong and not caring that I FAILED.
Watching a new sport be invented (Ultimate Ping Pong!!!)
Hugging people.
Learning to trust God more than ever.
Watching four precious saints be baptized in the lake.
Crying for joy with them.
Remembering and missing Grandpa Bob.
Laughing at the cheesy and marvelous slideshow.
Counting the times people said, "It's cold out here."
Wearing the dorky life jackets.
Being honest with people who care about me.
Learning new things about myself.
Wondering about other people.
Loving and being loved.

My heart is full and yearns for heaven. But while I'm here, it soars to be with the church family that I love more than words can say. ♥

Campout tomorrow!!!

Yes I'm excited. Could you tell??? ☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺Today was a MAD scramble to finish shopping for campout food. We loaded up three carts FULL at the grocery store. Then we stuffed it all in our little Civic. Then we unloaded it all at home. Then we loaded it all into Uncle Don's truck. Then we drove to the church and unloaded it there. And TOMORROW we load it up again and drive it up to Clearlake. Whew! But I'm still smiling! 8D
So I thought your Jeff's friend Ben was going to come on Wednesday to church too? But I suppose I misheard. Too bad, he was a really funny fellow.
I watched a movie today called Funny Girl. It's a musical with Barbra Streisand and Omar Sharif. Really good stuff. I know Streisand is kind of a nasty old weirdo in real life, but she's a really good actress. And outstanding singer. She and Dianne Weist are probably my favorite actresses. (Dianne Weist was the Avon lady in Edward Scissorhands and the evil queen in The 10th Kingdom.)
I finished packing today; it's amazing how much stuff I feel like I have to bring to a four-day trip! And I even tried to pack light this time! But what can I say: girls will be girls.
Since I'm going into my senior year of high school, it seems like everybody everybody EVERYBODY is asking me what my plans for the future are. Ugh, I don't like being reminded! How am I supposed to decide what I want as a "career" or whatever, when my ultimate goal is to get married and have kids, just like God designed. But I don't even know if I'll get that far. I mean, of course I want that; every girl I know wants that. But I just don't know if it could work. It's a little weird for me.
So I guess I should start thinking about my future on a practical level. College and work and all that lovely stuff. XP Not so lovely when I start thinking seriously about it. What's my problem? Megan wants to be a dental hygienist, Danna wants to be a nurse, Robyn's a hairstylist, Marinda wants to go into landscaping, and me? I'm completely aimless!!! Well, working with books has always sounded promising. If I could find an interesting line of work there. But it's scary to me to do anything important or to make any important decisions. I need discipline, that's what I need.

I'll think about it again after this marvelous weekend. See y'alls (or most of y'alls) tomorrow!☺☺☺☺☺☺

Next day!

So I hardly ever post the day after my last post. It usually seems like a waste. But here I am anyways.

So last night's dinner with Maribel went pretty well! Between Mommy and Daddy, I think she really got the gospel. I don't think she was really ready to accept it and let it penetrate, but she said she'd read the Bible verses my mom gave her as they left. But what a sweet family they are! Her mom doesn't speak any English, but her sweetness and motherly kindness showed in her face. She said to my dad a few times (translated by Maribel) that he has a very beautiful family. :) That was nice of her. Maribel also has a son named Kevin. He's eight and pretty sharp! He holds his own in a conversation pretty well (although he frequently inserts comments about Legos and Spongebob).

But guess what: Maribel thought I was 13. You all know how much that kind of thing bothers me. But hey; I've decided to not let that bug me so much. What I need to realize is this: whenever I hate the way I look, obsess over looking older, or compare myself to pretty girls, I'm basically pointing my finger at God and saying, "You didn't make me right! Why can't I be beautiful?" That is just pure sin and selfishness. So call me on it if I ever complain about that again.

I saw Megan's freshly painted room today. Very cool! It's chocolately brown and stuff. So Michelle and I chilled over there all day. We went to Macy's and guess what: Tyler was working! So we talked to him for a little on his break. I also tried a new eyeshadow at the makeup counters (yes boring to hear about). But it was really really REALLY bright blue. Kind of cool and weird.

So then the Nodurfts picked me up back at Megan's house and drove me to my house; they were coming out here anyways to have dinner with us. Daddy grilled steak. Nicey-nice! (I think people think I'm a total dork when I say that, but whatever)

And now the Nodurfts have gone home and I'm posting here at 10:45 posting. Anything else I need to talk about...hmmmm...don't think so. I think tomorrow will be uneventful. Oh, I almost forgot! I checked the bowling alley fees and there's a discount if we go between 3:00-6:00 on a weekday. So I'm thinking Monday or Tuesday? Gimme feedback.

I think I use a lot of run-on sentences and fragments in my blog posts. Never was a grammar fiend. :P

Not much going on here

Soooo it's been almost a week, figured I'd better make a new post. Not much has really happened this week though. I went to Oaks Park yesterday, I guess that's something. But there's not really a lot of good rides there though. In my opinion, the most fun ride there is the Screamin' Eagle, which I happen to find very relaxing. Seriously, I just de-stress when I go on that ride. And the roller coaster? I didn't even scream once the whole ride. Not that it wasn't fun, but it was just pretty simple and short.
Michelle spent the night last night. That was fun as usual, but it seems like we end up talking about a lot of the same stuff every sleepover. Taking apart the past, seeing how it relates to the present, speculating about the future. That can be either uplifting or depressing, depending on what you're talking about. I for one am rather unsure about my future. I mean, anything could happen to me since I don't really have any solid plans. Of course, I know that whatever plans I make, it's still in the hands of God. But I just don't have any clue of what I want to do! Sometimes I get scared that I'll make stupid choices and then have to live with them forever.
Aunt Lori emailed saying that the Predmores are coming to campout!!! I'm so happy! Haven't really got to chill with the whole family for quite a while. Better brush up on my lightsaber warring so I can pwn lol.
A lady is coming over for dinner tonight. Anybody at church last night during prayer requests knows who I'm talking about. Pray about it! She's not saved, and so we want to witness to her and the family she's bringing. I'm a little nervous; never met the lady.

Blogging? More like slogging...

I'd like to start off by saying that I myself did not delete that paragraph or those comments. That was my mother. My parents have made the decision that I will not be seeing The Dark Knight. My feelings on the subject shall remain undisclosed.

I haven't been posting for several reasons. One, my family did some stuff for the first couple days of the week. Dad had Monday and Tuesday off, so we spent the time together. My favorite place was the lavender farm we went to. Have any of you guys ever been to a lavender farm? It's purple and peaceful and smells AMAZING! I found myself singing hymns and dancing in the sprinklers like an idiot. And the nice lady who owned the place runs a little business; she gives you a zip-tie and lets you fit as much lavender as you can in it for $5.
Daddy also bought some lavender-mint tea, which I am drinking right now (quite good).

On Wednesday I saw the Parks again for the first time in two weeks (two weeks is longer than it seems)! Megan and I spent the night at their house and we three (me, Megs, and Bichelly) slept on the tramp. I always love that. Megan had to leave at 9:00 the next morning, which was stinky for all. Meaning, Michelle and I didn't get to hang with her as long as we'd have liked, and she had to go to work on five and a half hours of sleep! XP

Today started out good and ended badly. Even though it's not over yet. This morning, Mom, Lily, and I went shopping and I scored a major find at Kohl's Early Bird Sale. So far, so good. Then we did some other running around town. The weather was nice, and the stores we went to weren't boring. Still not a bad day. We came home, and I sat down to read a novel. The rest of the family was watching a movie, so I had some nice alone-time in the living room. Then when the movie finished, they all came into the living room. I was surprised and rather ashamed at how irritated I was that they were chattering and banging around so fast after their movie finished. I mean, they weren't acting any different than usual...I just was being more of a recluse than normal. So here it starts to get grumpified.
I decided to do some proofreading for Muriel on her story, "The Blood on the Sidewalk," when I remembered that I had lost it. Bad feeling in pit of stomach. Guilt, embarrassment, annoyance at myself for being so careless. I'm probably going to have to reprint out the first draft and have her mark out the corrections AGAIN. That was a major goof on my part.
Next, I decide to look for my missing makeup bag. Note: my makeup is not irreplaceable, nor is it completely necessary.
But it's expensive. And tomorrow is Sunday.
So I start digging around in my stuff, to no avail. It's not there. Either it is buried in some hidden corner of my room (doubtful) or it's at the church. In which case, someone may have moved it or taken it thinking it was theirs.
So now I'm getting upset. I've lost two things that I consider important! Frustrated, I decide to start on my new novel from the library. Now, this isn't a book I checked out; it's a book that I got from completing the summer reading program. It's MINE. So I ask Mom, "Hey, where is that book I gave you to put in your briefcase at the library?" You can guess the response.
"You never gave me a book at the library."
So I scramble around my room, the bookshelves in the family room, even the car. It's not there. I dig through Mom's entire briefcase, hoping she's wrong about this. Of course she's not.
You guys don't understand how I feel about books, so this next sentence is going to seem very ridiculous.
I shut myself in my room and cried. Big, hot tears all over the knees of my pants. Dead serious.

Tomorrow's softball picnic should be sort of fun.

Aaaahhhh...Peace and Quiet

After two weeks of rubbing a cheese grater on my nerves, my cousin has gone back home. I did enjoy having him here, but two weeks is a long time. He kept saying stupid stuff like, "I am chocolate!" or "Good job," and patting me on the arm. I probably embarrassed him because I started shrugging him off and twitching away when he would pat my shoulder or whatever. It was just a little too much!

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Mommy's painting the family room. Shhhhhh it's a surprise for my dad! It actually looks really great; nice tan color with a little brown glow. And we're getting a bunch of bookshelves for our library. That I am REALLY excited about. Imagine: a whole wall, crammed with all kinds of books imaginable! You probably can't guess how important that is to me.
I have five books to read by the end of summer. That's not including the six I already read. I hope I get it all done! Maybe I'll finish really early and be able to cram in another one. Books are from heaven.