I Hope I Challenge Me

Today I went to a meeting at the library. It was really weird. Out of about fifteen people, I was the only person there under the age of 20. I met some nice people, and learned a lot about how the library works and where it is going, but I was by far the dumbest person there. I did contribute a little, though. My discussion group was on "Diversity" (yes, I volunteered for that group, don't kill me) and I did help somewhat with brainstorming how to integrate that into the county's library system. The biggest thing I got from this meeting was how much the staff loves the library as much as the patrons. They truly are happy to be working there and enthusiastic about making it a better place. I did get a little choked up when I realized that that could be me...and I'm not taking it. I know that God's plan is the right plan, and that's what I really want, but I've never felt so inspired to WORK HARD as the times when I see what librarians can do and get to do. I feel a little like I'm missing out. But not enough to pursue that when I know I won't have time for a career and still be dedicated to my future family. Not a lot of careerist homeschool moms out there.

My birthday is coming up. I think I'm going to just have us go bowling; does that sound okay to you? This will be my last birthday party, in fact I feel too old for it now. But I might as well have one for my eighteenth and then be done with that. :)

Tomorrow is dinner at the Parks house. A few months ago, this would've brought a huge smile to my face and lots of ideas of what Michelle and I can do while I'm there to have crazy fun and maybe finagle a sleepover afterwards. ^^ But now it's different somehow...I don't know that either of us have changed all that much, but--well I take that back. One of us or both must've changed somehow for me to feel like our friendship is different. Maybe it's a part of growing up; Michelle is still very much a teenager and living life in the moment. I do that too, but I think that parts of me are starting to become the person I will be for my whole life. In a week I'll be legally an adult. Isn't it time I start thinking like one?

I got The Two Towers soundtrack from the library today. It's immense. The quality of the disk is crap, though (of course it is, it's from the public library), so it's hard to get into the more emotional parts when you have a "tch tch tch" going in the background constantly. -_- Speaking of Middle-Earth, I started The Silmarillion today. It's from the First Age, which is thousands of years before the Third Age, in which the Lord of the Rings takes place. So far it's interesting; I think I just love having a book to hold and call my own.

The other day, when I went to my bookshelf to get it (Silmarillion), I saw in front of my books someone had put a picture frame. Not really a big thing, it was probably in the way somewhere and got stashed the first place seen. But in the picture frame was a photo of Noah. Even after three months of being resigned to having lost these friends of mine, it broke open anew. I wept for Noah, I wept for Melinda. When will I be able to get past this, if even now it draws tears? I can sort of see how people get loathe to make new friendships or become close to someone, when having them ripped away from you is one of the most painful experiences I can even think of.

I can see my bedroom floor. That is a big deal if you know my room. o.O

To Keep Above Water

So yaaaaay I'm posting. When I should be doing school, especially since I took a break midway through the school day to go to the movies hehe. I went to see Inkheart with Lily...I think Ethan's tee shirt sums it up:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=986017&op=7&o=global&view=global&subj=824461257&id=724350670

Yeah. -_- Since I don't think any of you guys have read the book, it would be pointless for me to point out all the flaws of this film, so I'll spare you...I guess it was just cool to do something with just Lily for once. Although I embarrassed her horribly (of course) during the previews before the movie by singing random lalala's during silent moments and clapping gleefully during the Cartoon Network commercial. She was sufficiently mortified. ^^

On Saturday there was a surprise birthday party for Marinda. We went to the beach and then back to her house. It was a good time; I think Marinda was blessed a lot that we thought of her (or rather Michelle did and got us in on it...anyway). :)

I'm supposed to write a current events editorial this week. Any ideas of a big deal topic I can "imo" on? I'm so sick of reporting on the newest mess-up President Obama is doing to "save" America.

A question that has been bouncing around in my head for a while: why are many atheists moral?

Today I finally got back into my library work. They put me on light duty because Kathy, the volunteer coordinator, is super afraid of me breaking my stitches. So I sat and stamped WITHDRAWN on books for two hours. Nothing special in that, but I got to meet a lady named Jeanne (pronounced Jeanie). I almost got to share the gospel with her. We started talking about church, since I mentioned that I go. I asked if she goes to church, and she said no. I asked if she believes in God, and she said yes. Seemed like an open door, right? Well, as soon as I decided to take the conversation beyond that, she sort of--politely--shut it down with a "yeah" and bent closely over her work. :( She was really nice, though, and I was glad to have met her. Maybe someday I'll be able to seriously talk to her about God.

Kathy (aforementioned coordinator) has invited me to be in a meeting which will help give directional ideas to the whole county's library programs! She looked at the types of demographics they want, and noticed homeschooler on the list. So now I get to go to a meeting and discuss what the future of the library should be in our area! Who knows how much I'll be able to contribute, but it's exciting nonetheless. And she told me that it can go on my resume. X)

Only one more LotR installment, and then we're done. I'm quite prepared to keep a box of Kleenex nearby for the more emotional moments. Both :'( and :'). RotK was the first movie that made me :'). I wonder if the other three watching with me will get teary....

I'm reading The Pilgrim's Progress. What a wonderful book! The theology is much deeper than I imagined it to be. And even though it was written hundreds of years ago, the parallels to the Christian life is absolutely relevant and precise.

In my entire brain, there are probably millions of thoughts bumping around. The hard part is deciding which ones to pull out and analyze for all to see...maybe I'll pull a Jeff and be secretive whilst telling people I'm being secretive. ;)

My hair looks nasty!

I haven't brushed it yet today and I look like a cavewoman lol.

Today I had to do the impossible in writing class...write a positive paragraph about Barack Obama. It was painful. But thankfully, I got to undo all that in a second paragraph that squashes him flat! XD

We finished Fellowship of the Ring yesterday. Twin Towers is next! ;) hehe Jeff. I'm getting grumpier and grumpier all the time thinking about Megsie having an 8-5 job. -_- It's not what I would have done. Oh well, she's happy about it, so that's all that matters, right?

My finger can almost bend all the way now! Not quite, but by the time I get the stitches out next week, I'll be a-ok! *knock on wood* :D

Tonight is the Ladies' Christmas Party. Yes, I know it is January. But with all that yucky snow (OH THAT'S RIGHT I said yucky) last month, we never got to have it. :( Hooray!

I've been assigned to write a summary of Philippians. Today I started on the first chapter, and it stuck out to me how much Paul absolutely LOVES those people! Such an admonishment to me; I mean, I love you guys to death, but read this:
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=philippians%201;&version=50;
That's real love.

My family is driving me insane. But I guess that means I should read Philippians 1 again, right? >.<

Emily is Boring Today :'(

So yesterday I was moping that I wouldn't have any fun on the weekend with my friends. So guess what? I got an email from Michelle this morning asking if I wanted to go hiking with them? Sounds great right? Well, of course, you know me; I said no. :( I know, I suuuuck. But geez guys, can't you be a little more creative in your plans than two hikes in one week? Because you know that you'll never get me to go....

Part of my finger is going numb. Kind of freakin' me out, but Mom said don't worry about it. So I won't. 8(

Last night I watched (on Youtube) one or two episodes of a reeeaaaally old TV show called 21 Jump Street. The show itself was ehh. Kinda average quality, but there is one big reason I lurved it. Can you guess? ;)

So, instead of going hiking, it seems I'll be running around town doing errands and stuff with my mom today. Sounds boring, right? Might not be. idk, I think I like my family more these days. Bill and I get along better (for the most part), Mom has her ups and downs, and Dad is much more gentle. :)

So I sent in an email to Michelle this idea: since I'm rejecting the whole hiking thing, do you guys want to come over here after the hike and hang out/get some food? I can't guarantee what time would be okay, since Michelle hasn't emailed me back yet saying if she likes the plan. Once I hear from her, I'll try to figger what time would be good.

Well I gotta go take a shower and do some chores. I think I better cool my amount of computer time for a while here...Mom is getting pretty whiny about it.

Szechuan BURNING

Mom brought home the leftover Szechuan chicken and it's burning my lips like crazy! 8( Oh well, at least the dinner I made at HOME was good. Pasta alfredo with mushrooms. Yummy stuff (even though Lily said it was yucky). ^^

The bandage is off my finger, and now I'm looking at a nasty jagged line of stitches. Plus the finger is swelling up. Plus there's a couple weird bluish spots. I guess you probably didn't want to know about my creepy finger problems...sorry. XP

Today school was super-easy again, which I'm guessing it will be tomorrow too. Maybe these stitches aren't so bad after all. :) I'm counting down to the END of this school year...which means the end of high school!!! :D That's very exciting for me. Homeschooling has been a great experience, but it's starting to get to me. Being cooped up for so long can make a person crazy...jk (mostly). We already know that my fall into madness came quite a while ago, so the damage is done. :(

Mom and Dad went to dinner with the Gottwalds, who they hadn't seen for quite a while. Pray for Mike; his cancer is getting pretty advanced. Pray that he would find comfort in the Lord during his time left here.

While they were at dinner, I listened to a lot of music and chatted on Facebook with Jeff for most of the evening. That was pretty fun; now he's going to Albertsons so I'm here blogging...Bill also got a little crazy. She talks so funny online. X)

I think we're going to try to do something for a going-away type thing for Greg and Ethan on Sunday. I'm sorta counting on Ben reading this, since I forgot to call him today. And Jeff, you're invited too. Since you guys basically make up the extent of my readership (except for Washingtonians), I'll put the invite up here: we don't really know what we're doing yet, but we might hang out at my house or go to Park Lanes or something. Whatever we do, it won't be expensive. :) Do you want to come?

My fingers are so cold...breathing on them doesn't help. :'(

I printed off some piano music for Bill today. I got her Ice Dance, You Raise Me Up, and her favorite song...Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger! I hope she learns Ice Dance...Edward Scissorhands is one of the best movies ever. (Obligatory watch-with-someone-who-knows-the-scene-to-skip comment...)

Please sing me a song. I have Poker Face stuck in my head, and I think I've had about enough "mu-mu-mu-mah" for one day!

Hard to Type, Sorry.

It feels kinda good to be posting again. Except that typing is still really hard with this atrocious strap thingy around my finger. I take the bandage off in the morning, so hopefully I'll be free as a bird with my fingers! One upside to all this though--I got five more phone calls than I normally get! Which makes a grand total of five phone calls. And two of them were from the doctor's office. And one person didn't even ask how I as doing. :/ hehe. But I'm not bitter. ;) But guess what pretty much made my day? Michelle, Marinda, and Tami all came over and gave me juice and cookie dough!!! I love juice! That's a heads-up: if you ever are forced to get me something, and you can't think of anything, get me some nice box or bottle of juice. Yummy. :)

Michelle wrote a fancy-schmancy poem with magnetic poetry on my fridge. Something about rain drops journeying through the wood...I wrote a poem with magnetic poetry too, and it's much better. *ahem*

"People freeze and fall dead
In my refrigerator."

Whatcha think? Uuuuhhh I think I must've been a little loopy, because I was literally lying on the floor laughing after I wrote that. Not really that funny now that I look at it. But yeah, they're sweet sisters. I love my church family so very very much.♥

I ditched on a hike for tomorrow. Sorry guys, but it's just not my thang. Maybe someday when I get all fit and amazing super-woman or something. But have fun anyways! :)

Now that I start blogging again, I want other people to blog too. I like reading about the lives of my friends, as everyone has their own writing style and viewpoint of events. Plus it seems to be easier to be open about yourself on a blog. Not that that's always a good thing. X( Ugh but that's another story.

In case you're not on Facebook, I'm going to post a link on here that I posted there:

http://fiveprime.org/flickr_hvmnd.cgi?search_type=Tags&photo_number=100&photo_type=250&noform=t&quicksearch=1&sort=Interestingness&textinput=castle+france

I really want to see these. In person. A pipe dream, but maybe someday...and yes I know that a lot of these are Photoshopped. Don't matter to me none, I bet they're even better in real life. :)

Well there's my first REAL post of the new year. The commenting is the fun part!

...maybe?

It's a new year. Can't say a new me for sure. I think it's time I started blogging again. Life has changed in many ways, even since the last post here in September. I have to confess that it's not really good ways, for the most part. But that is neither here nor there; what matters is that I am still alive and ready to talk your ears off again, if you're ready to listen. Sorry for my choppy writing style; I have a bandage/cast thing on my finger that makes typing really slow and difficult. :P

Oh, and thank you to the "Anonymous" of my last post who encouraged me to start blogging again. I'm happy to see that there's at least one person who is checking up on me. :)